Clear the decks

No I haven’t turned into a swashbuckling sea-woman this month, even though the Pirates of the Caribbean films always make me want to buckle and swash with Johnny Depp. I’ve just decided to take a different approach to change.

Change is something that most people struggle with; ask any menopausal woman or person wanting to change their job, home or even life!

You see we enjoy the status quo, most people are comfortable with a life that’s jogging along nicely and not delivering any surprises, partly because we have the negative attitude that surprises might be horrible so we don’t embrace change in case we don’t like it. We live in fear.

Sometimes change is unpleasant, of course it is, real life issues happen and we feel out of control and decidedly miffed about things. Yet that fear shouldn’t make us feel that all change has to be frightening and we should stay in our rut because it’s safe and secure there.

Staying in a rut doesn’t prevent real life issues. What it does do is prevent people from ever having that “woo hoo” feeling when life delivers something so amazing they just can’t believe that it’s happened to them.

If you don’t believe that miracles happen that’s why you aren’t experiencing miracles, but they do happen to people who believe in them because they’re out there looking for them having dug their way out of their rut and left it far behind them.

If you meet a non-rut dweller, like me, you’ll find that we generally have a smile on our face and a plan. The first plan might not always work out, nor the second or even the third, but we have a plan and one way or the other we realise that plan.

The plan might even change as we grow and develop, but we’ll be flexible, take it in our stride, re-group and try the new plan. Flexibility is our watchword.

Change can be hard to bring about though. Especially if you’re a person who hasn’t been bought up with the idea that digging a rut is a very bad thing. So here are some pointers:

• Always be flexible. Don’t believe that you know everything including your own potential. Be open to synchronicity and coincidence, and be ready to adapt your plan if something better comes along.

• Be prepared to wait. You might think that the universe can always deliver what you want immediately, but sometimes it needs to get its ducks in a row before it can bring in your dreams. So send out your thoughts and wait.

• While you’re waiting keep your eyes and ears open. It’s no good the universe trying to deliver the person who can help you if you’re waiting for the good stuff to pop through your letterbox. Go out there, meet people, engage with them, and make yourself available to receive the next step in life.

• Clear the decks of everything that isn’t working for you. Don’t turn your life into a vacuum of what you always do, clear out and let go of anything that isn’t relevant. Old friendships, worn out business relationships, old clothes, cars you don’t like, hairstyles that you’ve never been comfortable with, houses you don’t enjoy living in; anything that isn’t working for you. If you don’t make space then nothing new can come in.

• Be financially sensible. We live in a world that requires money in order to function and it’s really, really daft to quit your job, sell your house, or do anything that puts you into a bad financial situation. That way lays a load of worry and worriers are never inspired. The better a financial situation you put yourself in the easier it is to spend time realising your dreams.

• Believe! If you are a glass half empty kind of person who believes that life is a bitch then the bitch will turn up every time. If you have a poor attitude to life go out there and find a good one. People with a good upbeat attitude succeed; it’s as simple as that.

• If you have a character problem, such as lack of confidence, do something about it. You can change the person you are, you don’t have to be full of negativity, and “Those who won’t change, don’t change, and nothing around them changes” (© Deb Hawken).

At the end of the day it’s as simple as these three questions:

1. Are you happy?
2. Do you enjoy life?
3. Will you take responsibility for your life and make changes?

If the answer to 1 and 2 is no, then the answer to number 3 better be “yes”. If you don’t know how to start you can always ask me.

Wishing you happy days, peaceful nights, and frequent positive change.

© Deb Hawken 2011
www.dancing-star.org.uk